stay conscious :)

i love remembering.. that im just one little person. one little universe. in a world full of universes.. that everyone has a story, an internal dialogue, something they dream about.. or things they have been through or are going through.

that’s why i like going outside.. i get to observe everyone else in their own little lives.. maybe someone is having a rough day and is sitting at the beach alone, maybe someone just got great news.. or i see a family or group of friends just enjoying time together.. its a reminder that you never know what the context of other people’s lives are. 

i think for myself, i often become so consumed in myself. in my ambitions. in my journey.. that i forget im just one little person, you know. like that in the grand scheme of things life is just this precious and momentary experience.. one that you don’t get back, or get to redo…

and that in observing people.. in just being mentally and physically outside, you get to remember what really matters. gratitude for experiencing. gratitude for living. for breathing. for food. for a roof over your head. for little moments. time with loved ones. sunshine. laughs. independence. physical autonomy.

i see people in wheel chairs, or old folks.. and i think, they would probably give anything for my able body. for the years i have. for the place im in. 

i think (maybe because of social media) we get fed this idea to always be asking for more. we become fixated on a projected idea of the future. perpetually running after something.. that we fail to realize, right here. this moment. this day is your life. today. right now. this isn’t to say don’t work towards things, but don’t put so much mental energy.. so much attention.. into something that isn’t living and breathing right now, that you forget what actually is.

i have to remind myself .. the past is gone, the future doesn’t exist. they are figments that only stay alive in our minds. in memory. what’s around u right now is real. what’s around u right now is ‘life’. like this is it! right here!!!! cherish her!!!!

im not sure i would say im particularly ‘afraid’ of anything.. but i do often think about how i never want to be someone .. old, bitter about the life i could have lived.. or the experiences i could have had. i never want to be that person who wishes they would have appreciated life more while it was happening. i never want to become someone who lives life looking in the rear view mirror.. like that their life only existed ‘behind’ them. i live, i exist, i learn, & i never everr look back. what’s past is gone.

i also think that’s a really special part of the rhythm i cherish with my lifestyle .. with bodybuilding. because it asks me to live only one moment, one day at a time 🙂

anyways! i am so grateful that life is lived with other people. it keeps you conscious. it keeps you grateful. thank you universe for where i am. thank you god.